Distracions

It seems to me that a common device for Oskar and Thomas in Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close is distraction. They are all trying to distract themselves from the harsh realities they are facing. Oskar tries to distract himself from the fact that his dad died with his mission of finding the lock to the key he has. It almost seems as if he is using random facts and leads to find this key (ie. Finding people whose last names' are Black merely because it said it on the letter.) One of the people that Oskar visited pointed out the semi-insanity of his mission. Oskar said:

"I found a key...and it was in an envelope with your name on it."
"Aaron Black?"
"No, just Black."
"It's a common name."
"I know."
"And a color."
"Obviously."

This just supports the fact that Oskar is just choosing to distract himself by going on a mission to find an imaginary lock that was related to his father. He also tries to make shallow relationships with the people he meets. This is shown in the scene when he has conversation and a cup of coffee with Abbey Black.

Somewhat similarly, Thomas cannot live his life normally ever since his girlfriend died. So when he met Oskar's grandma he could distract himself from the reality for a while. When they first met he described how originally she posed for him and he sculpted her as art. Eventually she caught on.

"He was sculpting me. He was trying to make me so he could fall in love with me."

Thomas wanted to fall in love so that he could be distracted. We are never really sure that it is ever a genuine love. They both get married and create a world of rules for themselves. It is rather insane-like. They seem distant from each other. Right before he decides to leave her we can see his shallowness. He says,

"I knew I was about to destroy what she'd been able to rebuild, but I had only one life to live."

Did he ever really love her or was she just merely another distraction and source of pleasure in his life?